Category Archives: Personal Development

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Who Is The Real ENEMY……

A vast majority of our problems today come from the SPIRITUAL world and not the world we can see.  Broken relationships, hate, racism and much more stems from the fact that we as humans all suffer from SPIRITUAL death before being reconnected with God.  As I coach clients in how to improve their lives, one of the most difficult things to show them is that the main reason why they are not living the abundant life is due to the condition of their Spiritual life.  As we have said goodbye to Rev. Billy Graham, we can thank him for showing millions how to come alive again and lead a life of abundance.

“How strange is the lot of us mortals! Each of us is here for a brief sojourn; for what purpose he knows not, though he senses it. But without deeper reflections one knows from daily life that one exists for other people.”
Albert Einstein, physicist

You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand”-Woodrow Wilson

Stephen Covey
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Why is Forgiving Someone So Difficult?

One of the most difficult things to do is to forgive someone…. Or Is it? One reason why forgiving someone is so difficult is because the person not wanting to forgive wants to maintain the control over you. Or so it may seem. Another reason why it is so difficult to forgive someone is because you have not realized your own wrong doing in the situation. Or, maybe you have not realized that you have sinned before God and you think God has not forgiven you so you cannot forgive someone else? Well, when you forgive someone who has wronged you, you are actually gaining more control over the situation and not less. You actually release yourself from the person who has wronged you when you forgive them. Have you ever heard the saying: Unforgiveness is like: “You take the poison expecting the other person to die”? This may sound ridiculous, but when you don’t forgive another person for what they have done, God says that he will not forgive you for your sins and you actually end up taking the poison that you had intended for the person who has wronged you. So, think about someone you are holding a grudge against today and call them up and forgive them! And watch how your life improves!

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The Before and After YOU! How To Become The Best Version of YOU!

Happy New Year to all of you! Have you always wanted to become the best version of YOU? Well lets start off the new year right! In previous posts we talked about setting goals and developing a personal mission and vision statement for your life. This is very important work, but you first have to DISCOVER your WHY? You have to discover your PURPOSE! God put you on this earth and designed you in such a way to accomplish great things for His Kingdom. But first, it is God’s dream to have a personal relationship with you. He wants you to call him Father! And for this reason, it is important that you have a conversion story! This is the time for you to take a different road. A time for you to do a U turn and find your true purpose. Perhaps you have heard others talk about their “Damascus Experience”? This is the time when once they were heading in one direction in life and now, they are heading in a different direction. I love the story of the Apostle Paul’s encounter with Jesus. It is told 3 times in the Book of Acts (9:1-18, 22:1-16, 26:1-18). So how does this apply to you? Well, the fact is God wants to see every person on this earth have a Damascus road experience. Perhaps not as dramatic as the Apostle Paul’s experience, but the experience that God has planned for you. He wants us to turn and experience a spiritual re-birth. God wants all of us to have a life changing experience with Jesus. (John 1:12, 2 Corinthians 5:17). This is the only chance we have for finding a life of PURPOSE.

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Do You Know Your Life’s Mission and Purpose?…

One of the most frequent questions I receive when working with clients is:”How to I figure out my purpose in life? What is my personal or life’s mission? The key to determining your life’s mission is to begin with the end in mind first. The first thing I recommend is to think about how you want to be remembered in life. What two or things would you want written on your tomb stone for all to see. Perhaps you want to be a great father, great husband or great business partner. Perhaps you want to be a great teacher, or professor or preacher. However you want to be remembered in life is where you begin. If you are still having trouble with this, think about what what motivates you and what your passions are and what people often ask you to do. This is an indication on what is important to you and can lead to clarity in determining your life’s mission. Now, break down each of the two or three ways you want to be remembered into monthly goals or action steps that you need to take to achieve that result. Don’t waste your time trying to live someone else’s dream for your life. Determine your purpose and life’s mission and do something towards it each day.

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Tips for a Happy Thanksgiving With Friends and Family

With Thanksgiving tomorrow I just wanted to wish everyone a wonderful day with family and friends. Here are a few tips to make it even better!

1. Less is more! It is better to go into the day with a feeling of gratitude verses high expectation. Less eating, less talking and more active listening will help you have a happy ending.
2. Look for the good qualities in everyone! It is very easy to find issues with family and friends, but make a commitment to only focus on the good qualities in everyone. Don’t let anyone take you down the wrong path and start an argument. RESIST RESIST and concentrate on the good qualities in everyone.
3. Get dressed up a little! I know that this isn’t a popular theme, but putting on your best clothes gives the entire party a “lift”. It dresses up things and sets a more elegant atmosphere for everyone. Nothing is worse than seeing someone look like they should be working in the garage sitting across from you on Thanksgiving!
4. Before you go, pull out the Bible and read God’s word. Nothing provides more insight into how to have a successful Thanksgiving.
5. Put out the candles! A beautiful table setting with real candles lit makes for better and warmer discussions! Think about the mood and the atmosphere of coziness!
6. Be Thankful for what you have! No matter what you have, be thankful and try to put that into all of the day’s discussions!

Okay, just some simple TIPS for having a great day indeed! Happy Thanksgiving All!

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The 20 CEO Behaviors That Can Hurt a Company’s Performance

For 30 years, I have worked with people, trying to influence people to work towards the goals of the company trying to put the right butts in the right seats and on the right bus going in the right direction. We call it strategic alignment and it is a critical component of executive success. Here are 20 habits of CEO’s that work against that alignment according to Marshall Goldsmith in his book “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There”:
1. Winning too much at all costs, 2. Adding too much to each and every conversation, 3. Passing judgment on others before understanding, 4. Making destructive comments and needless sarcasms, 5. Starting with “NO”, “BUT” or “HOWEVER”, 6. Telling the world how smart you are, 7. Speaking when angry, 8. Negativity or “let me explain why that won’t work”, 9. Withholding information, 10. Failing to give proper recognition, 11. Claiming credit that we don’t deserve, 12. Making excuses, 13. Clinging to the past, 14. Playing favorites, 15. Refusing to express regret, 16. Not listening, 17. Failing to express gratitude, 18. Punishing the messenger, 19. Passing the buck, and 20. An excessive need to be “ME”-exalting our faults as virtures!

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What Do Really Want?

Isn’t this the 10 million dollar question? When I ask people what they really want in my work, there is often a blank look on their faces. Many tell me they want material possessions, many talk about being financially independent of their jobs, but from my work with hundreds of people in these past 30 years, people are searching for their “why” in life. I call this finding purpose in life. Isn’t that what we are all trying to figure out? When we find our purpose in life that gives us clarity and when we have clarity, we find energy to pursue our goals. When we realize our unique Godly design, we begin to see how our gifts and talents help and inspire others. When we find our WHY, we find the reason we EXIST. And when we find the reason we exist, we begin to fulfill our MISSION in life. And when we start to live out our MISSION, we have a new VISION in life on how we will fulfill our purpose.

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Your Self Image Determines Your Results Achieved

When I begin to work with a new client, the first thing they want to improve are their results! And this always requires slight adjustments in their behavior! That is why I always start with helping them articulate their habits, paradigms, limiting beliefs and goals. When a client starts to become aware of them, we always start to discuss whether these current beliefs and habits will take them to the goals and destinations they have for themselves. Our self Image is a cybernetic instrument that either liberates us or keeps us in bondage. If we see ourselves as a winner, we typically achieve winning results! If we see ourselves as a loser, we achieve losing results as well. So, the next time you look at yourself in the mirror, make sure you realize that you are God’s masterpiece! No one in the entire world is designed like you! You are made in His image and never forget that!